Wednesday, June 5, 2013

banishing the ugly saggy old boobs

 You know something?  This has been a really hard post to start for some reason.  So how about I just jump in with the pictures, ok?  :)

rice sock, old and ugly

This, my friends, is a rice sock.  An ugly, old, stained, came-home-from-the-hospital-twelve-years-ago-when-my-son-was-born, been-used-a-whole-lot-since-then rice sock.  Once upon a time there were two rice socks.  But my dear son attacked them with yarn and scissors and only one survived.

Rice socks are great.  They are all socky and filled with rice and you heat them up in the microwave and drape them over your body and they sooth away your aches.  I like to wrap mine around my neck when I'm achy from a bunch of sewing.

What does this have to do with ugly saggy old boobs, you ask?  Check this out:

ugly droopy old rice sock

that is a picture of my wonderfully helpful doorknob modeling my rice sock for you so you can see how wearing it around my neck causes the rice to fall down to the ends, making them rather large and plump with those knotty things sticking out. 

The problem is, those round, plump ends are sitting on my chest making it look like I've got a second set of boobs.  Really ugly, saggy old boobs {the rice sock boobs that is, my boobs are just fine thank you}.  And those knotty tassel things sticking out make it all rather obscene.

Anyway, I went on a quilt retreat in May and because of all the sewing I'd be doing, I wanted a rice sock to put on my neck if I got all achy - but I didn't want to be walking around looking like I had two sets of boobs. 

Sooooo, the night before I left I was madly sewing this:

pretty rice sock

my new rice sock  :)   I used a blue flannel from Joanns.  The vintagy floral is so pretty, don't you think?

pretty rice sock, upclose & personal

I sewed across the rice sock, forming four sections, so the rice can't all fall to the ends.  No more saggy old boobs! Just soft, pretty ache relief.  :)

Edited to say: If you are interested in how I made my rice sock, check back in the next week or so.  I'm going to make another and will take pictures and share how I made it.  Together, we can banish ugly saggy rice boobs all over the world :)

I'm linking up to Really Random Thursday!, TGIFF, Whoop! Whoop! Friday, Crazy Mom Quilts, Submarine Sunday
June Finishes

16 comments:

Happy Turtle said...

Ha Ha :) Your title got me interested in the post and I had a good snicker! :) Thanks!
Carol

Seraphym said...

Had a good giggle at this post!! and the mental images were definately interesting!!
Loving the new non saggy version :)

Janine said...

Lol! Great post and your new rice sock looks great! How do you heat it up (oven? microwave?) and how long for?

Cindy Sharp said...

Brilliant.

Pomegranate Quilts said...

I love rice bags - and I love the story!

Lucy @ Charm About You said...

lovely fabric for your nice new rice sock! Yeah to no saggy boobs!!

Sara said...

That is a lot of boob talk in one post!!!

Hysterical!

Stephanie said...

Ha!! I'm planning on making myself a quilted heating pad pretty soon so this was such a great post at the right time! :)

Quilting Nonnie said...

I can tell you are a very shapely quilter! I love your idea about sewing sections. I've had the same problem with my rice boobs.

Jeni B Quilts said...

Thanks so much for the laughs over your "boobs"...I am happy to know that you got a boob job and now they are perky and pretty again!!

Stella Nemeth said...

I like that new rice sock a lot. And I can see where it would be extremely useful.

Archie the wonder dog said...

I've chuckled all the way through this post! I have a rice sock thing that's shaped so it sits really well round your neck but it's a bought one, I'd never thought of making my own!

Pieces of Cotton said...

I make these using feed corn instead of rice. It holds the heat longer. Nothing feels better on a cold winter night!

Sarah Craig said...

Thanks for the huge smile!!! Love the title of your post. Whoop whoop!!

Kelly Young said...

hehe! so funny! great idea to make your own!

-Kelly @ My Quilt Infatuation

Elizabeth said...

Too funny! Love you new rice pack. The fabric is so pretty, and I'll bet it is nice and soft. Great finish and thanks for linking up!

xo -E